I’ve been Online since I was 14-years-old. I first joined Facebook when it still required a university email. By the time smartphones were a thing I was already skeptical of technology and resisted carrying a computer in my pocket until regular cell phones became known as feature phones and too sad to justify. As someone who came up on the internet and was along for the rise and fall I feel qualified to say:
The vibes are off.
Chat rooms, message boards, social media apps, I’ve always had an online resource to connect with like-minded people who share my interests. Message boards died with the rise of apps. Facebook lost its luster around the time it helped elect a reality TV personality to the Oval Office. Instagram is increasingly no longer a place I recognize, and I mean this both figuratively as well as literally1 and I’m not even about to touch the TikTok of it all.
Social media, which began as a fun place to connect, has turned into a dystopian nightmare ruled by opaque algorithms meant to distract and amuse, addict and appeal to our worst instincts, and of course, sell us something along the way. But increasingly, the thing we’re being sold is less unnecessary consumer goods or aspirational lifestyles, and more propaganda and despair.
I feel like a sad digital refugee and I’m not alone. Not only have I had a number of conversations with friends this week, I’ve also organically read/listened to several pieces grappling with the social media question (see recommended links below.) It seems we’ve hit something of a tipping point.
In less than a two week span Meta ended fact checking, we experienced the utter debacle of TikTok dramatically shutting down and returning hours later with a hearty pro-Trump message pushed out to all U.S. users, and witnessed all the tech oligarchs (TikTok and Meta included) honored with front row seating at Trump’s inauguration, not to mention Elon’s West Wing office and obvious and overt role in the administration. Many of us are receiving the message loud and clear. This all while broad swaths of the country were literally on fire which social media used as another opportunity to spread conspiracy, disinformation, and discord.
It’s just too much. Anyone paying attention has to at minimum feel conflicted about remaining on these platforms, at most they’re screaming in the woods somewhere (literally or metaphorically, choose your own adventure.)
And where does that leave us?
Social media apps are hard to dispense with. At this point we’ve oriented society around them. It’s where the people are, where news is, where conversations are happening; what happens online is more relevant and real than ever. It’s truly dystopic how important social media has become and how much power this garners the tech oligarchs who own them. If everyone with a brain leaves, the platforms just get worse. But at what cost do we stay?
I don’t have the answers, it feels like a no win situation. (At least for us commoners, there are clear winners, they were at the inauguration.) Obviously this is something I’m currently grappling with. I do know I’m not alone and it’s something we’ll be forced to contend with as a society because it sure doesn’t seem like people are having much fun anymore.
Recommended:
Attention is Now Our Most Valuable Resource (The Atlantic)
The Social Media Sea Change (Culture Study)
The Episode China Doesn’t Want You to Hear (Offline)
Democrats Are Losing the War for Attention. Badly. (The Ezra Klein Show)
What I’m…
Reading
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows by She Who Shall Not Be Named. The first Harry Potter book released when I was 12 and by that time my reading tastes had surpassed both the middle grade and YA sections of the library and I had no interest in reading a story about wizards. At some point I wanted to read the series, by that time I had kids of my own and decided to read it with them. I read the first book with my oldest when he was about 7 and we both decided we needed a break after the first book (so long!) We eventually watched the movie adaptation as a family and then started the 2nd book in the series as a read aloud right around the time Covid hit in 2020 (the perfect time for a super long book!) My kids would have been 7 and 10 at that time. We read one book a year, usually during fall, until this year when we decided to read books 6 and 7 back to back and finally finished the series! My kids are now 11 and 14. The internet tells me the series is more than 4,000 pages, over a million words, and the audiobooks are 120+ hours, so a lot of time spent reading these books! Definitely a memorable family reading experience.
How to Sleep at Night by Elizabeth Harris. A Democrat grapples with his husband running for U.S. Congress as a Republican while the candidate’s sister, a political reporter also affected, reunites with an old flame. I found my way to this book via Sara Hildreth’s recommendation. I expected to like it more than I did, though I did find the ideas explored interesting. Usually I appreciate leaning into challenging topics at relevant times, but inauguration week may not have been the right time for this one. Sara has a good interview with the author if you’re interested in learning more about this book.
Listening
On Tyranny: Twenty Lessons from the Twentieth Century by Timothy Snyder. I read and appreciated Snyder’s On Freedom in November. I figured, no time like when we neglected all of Snyder’s advice after the first Trump election to go back and read On Tyranny 😑 This is a short primer on presently useful lessons we can learn from history. Still unfortunately relevant.
King: A Life by Jonathan Eig. I used Martin Luther King day as motivation to finally read this lauded biography. Published in 2023 it won the Pulitzer Prize and was a finalist for the National Book Award and absolutely deserves all the praise and critical acclaim it has received. This is a comprehensive, honest, and fascinating account of Dr. Rev. Martin Luther King, Jr. This was absolutely the best time for me to read this book. Dr. King was both a regular man and also an exceptional leader. He gave his life to the civil rights movement, experienced so many challenges, and also achieved lasting change. I think there’s much in his story for us to be reminded of and cling to in this dark time. The audiobook is narrated by Dion Graham, one of my favorite narrators, and he does an excellent job. Highly recommend listening.
There is a Rio Grande in Heaven: Stories by Ruben Reyes Jr. This is an Aspen Words Award Longlist selection. An incredibly creative short story collection exploring Central American identity.
Watching
Landman (Paramount+). *sigh* This show about the Texas oil industry is absurd. It’s from the creator of Yellowstone. If you like that, you’ll probably like this. I do not care for Yellowstone and I wouldn’t recommend Landman. I was drawn in by Jon Hamm and Billy Bob Thornton (and Demi Moore, but she’s not around much) who are predictably very good in this show, but OMG the writing is terrible! It is a soap opera written for men, by men. The women, including teen girls, are written in a really baffling male gazey type way. Given the cast and just the look and feel of the show I was expecting this to be something it wasn’t. I got several episodes in and decided to finish it because I’m forever duped by sunk cost. Do not be me, at least in this regard.
Eating & Drinking
Zuppa Toscana in the slow cooker! A regular in our soup rotation, I’ve never thought to try making it in the slow cooker. I’m happy to report it worked out very well. Nothing like getting dinner squared away early in the day! What I linked to is basically my recipe, it’s the method I used for the slow cooker. I skipped the bacon this time, I sometimes add a few slices if we have some to use, and I also add 2 cups of water and plenty of kale.
Cheeseburger Macaroni in the Instant Pot by request. I tweaked the seasoning a bit as follows: 1/2 T paprika and onion powder, 2 t garlic powder, 1 t mustard and chili powders, pepper to taste.
We’ve been enjoying citrus season in our house. The Sumos got eaten before I could get to them, but I’ve had my fair share of Cara Caras and Blood Oranges
My youngest turned 12 this week and Funfetti Pancakes are a birthday tradition.
Also mixed up some brownies for a requested birthday sundae treat
Links + Loves
One tiny step I took this week was blocking Meta from gathering and sharing my data. If you’d like to do the same (and why wouldn’t you?!) this Reel is helpful. Here’s a Newsweek article as well.
Sadie pup and I were finally able to get outside for walks a few days this week after the longest snowy/deep freeze stretch I recall in recent years. I’ve never been more thankful for a cold winter walk and I think Sadie concurs.
Unexpectedly enjoyed this piece on How to Build a Village
I’ve been using this shower spray for a few months and am finding it useful. I hate cleaning the bathroom, especially the tub and this spray seems to keep it cleaner longer. It’s inexpensive and has a light, fresh, spa-like scent.
This 5 minute vlog from John Green about audiobooks is worth a watch
Puzzles are one of my favorite ways to relax and keep my mind off The Horrors. Galison is my favorite place to shop for puzzles and they’re currently offering 25% off IHO National Puzzle Month.
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Until next time!
I’m no longer in control of my experience and this is by design. When I scroll my Instagram feed the top few posts are from people I follow, then I get some “suggested” content or ads; another post or maybe two from follows, then more crap I never asked for, and so it goes. It’s no longer even a 50/50 split of things I want to see vs. content the algorithm wants me to see, it’s definitely more of Meta’s chosen content. For an app which supposedly exists for community they make it intentionally difficult for me to connect with my chosen community.
I have similar feelings about IG, I was just thinking the last time I was on it that I barely recognize anything in my feed. It's so many ads and suggested follows it's insane. I miss the old days of IG but I think those are long gone
I deleted the ig app last week, something I've done before for breaks, but this time I don't miss it one bit and have not been tempted to go back. My mind feels so much better, and that's pretty terrifying