My 37-Year-Old Face

Fvck the patriarchy always, Nicolas Cage forever, OxiClean wins the week, plus The Weekly What

Last week I read a clickbait-y type article entitled This Is What a 37-Year-Old Face Without Filters or Makeup Actually Looks Like. This article drove me to click not only because I spend too much time thinking about how viewing the world through our screens distorts our understanding of reality, but also because I have a 37-year-old face; I was curious.

The article opens with a question we’ve likely all had at one time or another, “what am I supposed to look like at my age?” It goes on to talk about the comparison game, costly beauty trends, filters, the concept of “aging well”, and explains this photo roundup is the first in a new series of people showing their faces simply as they are with the intent of normalizing, well, normal faces, and challenging existing notions about beauty and aging.

I’m into this! Beauty ideals are bullshit, the internet lies, fuck the patriarchy - let’s see the real people!

Y’all. The real people aren’t real people.

I mean, they ARE real people, but this list is overwhelmingly populated by people who take exceptional care of their skin. I don’t think this is representative of the general population (right?! Am I wrong?)

This series begins with a group of 37-year-olds because that’s the age when people start to “freak out” about how their face is changing (super! Something new to worry about!) at least according to a single dermatologist they spoke to for the article (this doesn’t seem statistically significant, but who am I to say?!)

Of the 14 people featured chosen to represent what a 37-year-old face looks like simply as they are more than a third have had cosmetic work done, and most of these respondents have a list of procedures from surgery, to Botox and fillers, to treatments I’ve never even heard of before, and the real kicker is the average annual amount spent on skincare among this group is $2,800.

Two-thousand eight-hundred dollars.

That’s hundreds of dollars a month caring for the skin on their face.

And look, this is valid. I’m not here trying to put these people down. These are 37-year-olds and these are their faces.

People should do what they want with their bodies, including their faces, or at least what they think they want according to a patriarchal capitalist system (that’s a whole other discussion) but like… this group doesn’t really fit the vibe of the article, the whole showing people simply as they are.

Spending thousands of dollars on complicated skincare regimens, regular professional treatments, and cosmetic surgeries doesn’t exactly subvert the filterworld we exist in, does it?

It feels to me a little like applying the online filter to your face in real life. I’m increasingly convinced we no longer even understand the concept of reality.

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Here is my 37-year-old face simply as it is, free of cosmetic procedures or complex and costly skincare routines. Consider this my submission.

Name: Stephanie M.
Location: Columbus, OH
Occupation: Reader
Do you have children? Yes, an eleven-year-old daughter and a fourteen-year-old son
Do you smoke? No
Do you drink? Not regularly
Have you had any cosmetic work done? No
Skin care routine:

AM: Cleanse with Cetaphil Daily Facial Cleanser, Thayer’s witch hazel, Maelove vitamin c and brightening serums, moisturize with CeraVe Daily Moisturizing Lotion

PM: Cleanser, Nip+Fab Glycolic Fix Night pads or Maelove Retinal night serum, CeraVe Renewing Night Cream

Estimated annual amount spent on skin care: $250

Honestly it’s hard to even estimate how much (or little) I spend on skincare because I so rarely have to replace any of these products and when I do they’re inexpensive. I know I’m not spending thousands of dollars though, which this article has left me more confused whether this is normal or not. I also rarely wear makeup and when I do it’s very minimal because I don’t like stuff on my face.

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Tell me:

• What’s your skincare routine?

• Do you feel like this article achieved its aim of normalizing faces and challenging existing notions on beauty and aging?

• Anything, let’s chat!

What I’m…

Reading

• Ready or Not by Cara Bastone. An unexpected romance I loved!

• Rainbow Black by Maggie Thrash. Queer coming of age against a Satanic Panic backdrop. Different! I dug this.

• The Other Valley by Scott Alexander Howard. Still digesting, but I did not like this as much as anticipated.

Listening

• The Women by Kristin Hannah. I could not resist the siren’s call of a book about women who went to war during the Vietnam era. I can’t say I was disappointed, more like it met my low expectations.

Watching

• True Detective: Night Country (Max). I thought this was the best season of True Detective since the first. Loved the Alaska setting during all day darkness.

• Dream Scenario (Max). I love Nicolas Cage movies. This was weird, but I liked it. An A24 film.

• May December (Netflix). This was okay. It’s nuanced and layered and watchable.

Eating & Drinking

• Corned beef, cabbage, and potatoes for St. Patrick’s Day

• Chicken and Dumplings for a cold, snowy Monday

• Chili Mac in the Instant Pot + quick steamed broccoli

• The best Sloppy Joes - a family favorite! I served these with some Trader Joe’s sweet potato fries from the freezer + roasted broccoli

Links + Loves

• This OxiClean wins the award for best purchase this week. It did an impressive job cleaning up my daughter’s tennis shoes that were stained from wearing them in mud (-_-) and breathed new life into a load of white towels, including hand towels that were stained (do your hand towels end up disconcertingly dirt streaked after kids have washed their hands? Or does this just happen at my house?)

• Okay, but runner up for best purchase is this nail polish organizer. I tackled the linen closet (while listening to The Women) this week and bought this to replace the broken plastic storage box that used to house my nail polish. I’m pleased with the outcome! Super easy to find shades now.

• Celebrated the start of spring browsing this list of 44 Most Anticipated Books of the season

• Enjoyed this timely article about eclipses in fiction

• Am I the Literary Asshole? When To Mute Your Friend on the Internet

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Until next time!